THE NEW SOUTH AFRICA ...where all are so wonderfully transformed and equal...
some are just more equal than others
Click on thumbnails for larger version
Life in the New South Africa, alias Azania, is really a treat, a wonderful treat, - as long as you are black. And that's official. You see, if you are black, you are, ipso facto, disadvantaged, dispossessed, badly done by, historically discriminated against, disempowered, and poor. So the glorious ruling Party (and its 'people's court', the so-called Constitutional Court) has decreed that in the wonderful New South Africa you are entitled to be empowered, advantaged, and enriched by all kinds of so-called affirmative actions and expropriation of (white) land, regardless of merit or historical facts, - if you belong to the pigmentally correct class. Then nothing can go wrong, literally. And if anything bad does happen to you, - why, it's simple. Just blame it on apartheid! It always works. And you can shout "kill the Boer, kill the farmer" as much as you like, and nothing will happen to you as long as your name is Peter Mokaba and you are a prominent member of the ruling ANC/Communist cabal. And even if somebody lifts up an eyebrow at the obvious link between your hate-speech and the killings of thousands of defenceless whites, - why, back to rule 1 : blame it on apartheid. If, on the other hand, you are one of the over hundred women raped in the wonderfully transformed New South Africa every day, or perhaps one of the about sixty daily murder victims, surely you must realise it is not the fault of the black killers or rapists, oh no!, - it is all the fault of good old bad apartheid, such a convenient stand to hang any kind of hat on! Equally so, if you are mugged, highjacked, or robbed, - surely it must be because you did not show enough appreciation for the priviledge of living in the wonderful democracy of Azania. And you have not done enough yet for the glorious Azanian transformation process, you horrible white reactionary, you, and there is the perfectly understandable need for some rather faster and more drastic transformation. Like from rich to poor, or from fit to cripple, or from alive to dead. In Azania-speak we call this the privatised, fast-track kind of transformation.
On the other hand, if you are pigmentally correct and just a normal kind of guy, without politicaL connections, then you might have some problems, too. In fact, the longer these illustrious Great Leaders of yours are lording it over you, the more it becomes evident that you are actually worse off now than ever before in the 'bad old apartheid days'. Maybe you are one of the more than 500 000 people who lost their jobs over the last 5 years since the ANC-Communist alliance was given free reign? Or maybe you were naive enough to believe all the propaganda about houses for all, land for free, and a buckshee Mercedes in your backyard, - all without working for it. Well, old chap, it can be done, - but only if your name is Yengeni, or Mbeki,or some other Xhosa-sounding surname. If not, you'd better realise the Dark Age of Black Africa has descended on this beautiful land of ours...
showing 'Holy Nelson' Mandela, shortly after being elected as the first Azanian
[New South African] President toy-toying with his fellow Comrades. The picture has not
been altered and was displayed in the Flying Springbok, official magazine of the SAA. [New
South African Airways.] There was much speculation as to why a so-called President would
wear a sock with a big toe sticking out. Some say it was a publicity stunt to evoke
sympathy and to cover up the fact that he receives an annual income of nearly a
million Rand, and that his wife Winnie wanted 20 million as half the spoils allegedly
accumulated by him. Others say he must be blind, or ignorant of the fact that socks do
need darning every now and again. Still others say that with the current value of the rand
he probably can't afford a new pair of socks. And some wit thought he might have
been so much under the impression of his new sanctified status, that he made sure his
socks are 'holey', too. Whatever the truth, Nelson Mandela is probably the best
ventilated African president who ever lived in modern Africa.
Winnie Mandela, so-called
"Mother of the Nation".Cartoon from 'Rapport' depicting her at Heathrow airport.
Although being fired as deputy Minister more than a year ago, she was travelling
with a "diplomatic" passport, - a favourite with black African 'emperors',
dictators and life-long fathers and mothers of nations. She is on record as saying:
"With our matches and tyres we'll liberate this country". The method used
by her and her so-called "soccer club" to convince people to go along with her
and the ANC/Communist cause was to tie people up, force them to drink petrol, putting a
tyre around their necks [photo image], soaking them in petrol and then set them
alight. Filmed by pro-ANC overseas film crews, the barbaric killers would then dance
around the screaming, wriggling human torch and shout and kick and spit on it until death
mercifully ended his/her life. More than 400 known cases of this crime were reported.
Mandela herself was accused of at least 13 child murders. The book Katiza's
Journey, about a young Zulu's traumatic life as a member of her notorious
'soccer club", written by Fred Bridgland with a foreword by British MP Emma
Nicholson, gives one a glimpse into the soul of this so-called "liberator".
Apart from a half-hearted, failed attempt to convict her of the murder of young Stompie
Sepei, Mandela was never arrested, charged or prosecuted for her atrocities in spite
of overwhelming evidence against her. Allegations have since come to light that she uses
cheques of the Mandela Childrens Fund to wine and dine her friends on the Cape Waterfront
as well as in the Kruger National Park. She was eventually charged with defrauding cheques
of the ANC Womans League in 2001 involving about a million rand. And still she is a
'revered' political figure surrounded by scores of black and white flunkeys...
During the Rhodesian bush war against the Communist-backed Zanu PF, an incident happened vaguely like this "...An enemy-base was attacked. The well-trained Rhodesian attack force soon took control. While searching the terrain, a soldier got on the radio: "Sergeant, this once's got a wooden leg!"
Came the answer; "Do a 360 and
look for the parrot..."
Overheard in a "New" South African Shebeen: "Did you hear
Holy Nelson and Graca Machel s' wedding plans were postponed for at least a week?
When asked about his well-being in prison, a Boer political prisoner 'humbly' replied with this sketch :
Overheard on the border as part of the lecture to prepare some brave
troopies for the coming battle : "If you can see the
white of the enemies' eyes, you know you're running the wrong way..."
Scientists are reported to be considering using politicians for
research, rather than rats. The reason being that they get too attached to the rats,
because they are more loveable. Politicians also breed faster than rats and there are some
things that rats will not do!
During an ambush of a road deep inside Mozambique by a small Rhodesian force, two even smaller early warning groups were placed on both sides to warn of the expected enemy reaction force. Eventually, after over 20 'kills' of armed terrorists running into the ambush, this reaction force arrived and made contact with Billy's eraly warning group in the east. Billy was only supposed to hold them off to give the main ambush group the time to pack up and leave. Soon the enemy began throwing mortar bombs, - unfortunately, for them, slightly off target and onto the heads of their own men. Came the exultant praise over the radio from the early warning group "Well done, Willem, well done! Keep it up, keep it up!" The rather surprised mortarman Willem Butler, who had not fired a single shot yet, looked at the commander, the commander looked at him, and they both giggled and enjoyed the welcome, but somewhat undeserved praise.
Meanwhile, the disgusted enemy point platoon had obviously sent through corrections, and their mortars began adjusting their line of fire, - rather too close for comfort to dear Billy, who until then had been happily contemplating the excellence of his own mortar support. Next came his outraged shout over the radio : " Stop firing, Butler you c... ! Stop!"
Deep in thought, a man sits sipping his drink at a bar counter. "What's the problem, old chap?" someone asks. "You know," says the deep-thinking man. "I'm worried. In nature, everything balances out, - if you have a strong point somewhere, you have a weak point somewhere else. For example, if someone is strong, he's normally not so bright; if someone is handsome, he is often weak; if someone is brave, he is slow; if someone is fast, he is sometimes ugly; if someone is good, he is normally poor; if someone is rich, he is bald and fat..." "So what's the problem, old fruit?" "Well, the problem is, that I'm now nearly fifty years old, - and I STILL haven't been able to find my weak points..."
When former South African "old South Africa" President P.W.
Botha was forced to resign as Pesident by conniving Pik Botha and F.W.de Klerk he refused
to vote in a following election that signed South Africa over to the ANC/Communist regime.
A cartoonist captured the moment of his refusal.
. Please, support our
African Renaissance program
by donating some of your wealth to our employment buro, just look out for taxis and car thieves!
A dark-complexioned man finds a dusty old bottle in Soweto. He dusts it off and a genie appears, offering him three wishes.
"E wannade Maciedies" -
Poof a big, black Mercedes appears. "E wanna de beeg hows!" - Poof a mansion
appears. wanna be white likka de baas!" - Poof he becomes white. And Poof! the
car and the house vanish. "How Wa!!! Wezma cah en hows?"
If you want another Benz and house,
go work for it!"